Unless you have no standards or you’re famous, you’ve been there. Stop lying. The cylinders just ain’t clickin’ ladies & gentlemen. That best of Sade CD (or nowadays your “midnight passion” play list on the ipod) ain’t been used in forever. Your hormones have you running through every number in your cel and emailing every loose strand you ever messed with (or never got a chance to mess with). Some people even go as far as to call up that ex fit for a Jerry Springer episode. Nightclubs are dead. So you join eharmony and after spending 3 hours filling out a profile, you’re hit with a $20 per month fee to hook up with some hog named Ethel or some clown with 2 of his teeth left (and both are molars). It happens to the best of us, join the club. How do you shake a dry spell? Everybody has their own method, but check the September Gator$-n-Fur$ Mixshow (Dry Spell) and find out how Chief Chinchilla and I deal with it (this is the free download link…click here)! Enjoy the show, this is the last one until December. Why??
ALBUM AND VIDEO UPDATES!
As some of you know, Chief Chinchilla has finally completed his debut album (produced by yours truly) and it’s called J-Zone presents…Chief Chinchilla: Live @ The Liqua Sto. Guests include Prince Paul, RA The Rugged Man, E-Swift (of Tha Alkaholiks), Louis Logic, Celph Titled and many more! The album is a collection of funky malt liquor advertisements (like the Old St. Ides joints) and it will be out in early October! The album took 2 months of intense work, so we’re taking October & November off from Gator$-n-Fur$. Enjoy the album and support it when it drops (you WILL know when it drops because I will flood your inbox with reminders like a madman).
As anybody who knows me knows, I’ve never been a video guy. I don’t like being on film, I’m scared of the internet and videos are a pain in the a*s to shoot. But this is 2008 and youtube is the new MTV. If it was up to me, I’d walk into a 7-11 and talk trash to the surveillance camera, pay the cashier for the tape, put some music behind it and that’s my video. I’m willing to meet you halfway. There will be 2 short video/trailers to promote this project. The first being a music video for “Can I Get A Sip??” from the album -I’m not in it, Chief took a Greyhound bus down south to do that one behind my back- and a trailer for the album in which I put my camera phobia behind me for the sake of promotion. We’re filming at the moment, but as soon as editing is done in the next few weeks, we will get those to ya’ll.
And finally, I’ve gotten emails about why Chief Chinchilla doesn’t have any words in these updates. He doesn’t like people, but we’re both getting used to the 2008 way of thinking. I accepted the fact I need to provide some type of video promotion and he’s stepped into the blogging world. He wants you all to know he’s appreciative of the support, but he has some choice words for the haters that don’t like him. The excerpt below was taken from his myspace blog. It’s not for the faint of heart, I warned you.
WORDS FROM CHIEF CHINCHILLA (9.7.08)
“Yea what up myspace, this is Chief Chinchilla aka The Onion Ring Pimp aka PETA’s worst nightmare aka The Furglar. I’m new to this myspace bloggin thang, so I’mma just speak my mind. My dude J-Zone posted up some info this week about this album Live @ The Liqua Sto on his myspace. In case you didn’t know, thats my debut album. He produced it, but this is my muthaf**kin party and only the ladies, the 40 guzzlers and those that wear fur for no apparent reason in the August heat are invited. I wanna take the time to thank Prince Paul, DJ E-Swift Of Tha Alkaholiks, RA The Rugged Man, my dawg Al-Shid, Celph Titled, Poison Pen, Crazy DJ Bazarro, Breeze Brewin from The Juggaknots, Ammbush from Oakland, Creyesis The Jamaican MC and of course my homie Louis Logic. Lil kids think he’s Lenny Kravitz when they see him in the airport, but thats my dawg. Of course J-Zone and everybody else that contributed to this work of art. But I wanna address these haters that are comin’ out the woodworks now that I’m boutta get a real album under my belt. Yall done f**ked up real bad. You let me in the game and gave me a chance to make some $$$ and be heard. When I start buildin White Castles in your hood with my royalties and money from my fast food and malt liquor endorsements, just sit down, shut the f**k up and let them bulldozers roll. Let em tear down that punk azz Starbucks that you used to love so much when you would sit in there on yo punk azz drankin tall lattes usin free wi-fi and panning J-Zone albums back in the day for some toilet tissue pseudo-cosmo wanna be innovative art fart hip-hop magazine you wrote for. Reverse gentrification is a mutha ain’t it?! Go head and pan this album too, just because you have a degree in communications from NYU, doesn’t mean you know music you dry sh*t shish-kebab. Payback is a b*tch and she’s at that time of the month and just finished reading Superhead’s book.. Good luck you Pabst Blue Ribbon drankin Son of a B*tch. And all yall that are gettin bent outta shape bout this muthaf**kin fur I wear and represent…f**k yall. With all the problems in the world, you gonna throw the PETA game at me? Get the f**k outta here! I got “Fur Is Wrong” and all these people trying to add me as a friend on this punk azz myspace garbage. Back up off my line, everything I wear been done had a heartbeat at some point, so just make sure you fall back and let me do my fall shopping at the zoo in peace. Amphibians, reptiles, sea sh*t, hyenas…all that. Just go to the Gap and shut up. No love lost, if you want the number to my dry cleaner, I’ll put you on so you can press n crease that fur like muah. And to the ladies. Ya’ll been frontin on me. Its OK. The album drops in October, on the new Gator$-n-Fur$ mixshow I put yall in the flames for playin me and you gonna realize you done passed up this Onion Ring Pimpin for some Wedding Ring Simpin. You’re pathetic and you will be a bullethole ridden White Castle burger in your next life, I pity you. You peasant. But to all showin the Chief love…thank you! To all the Gator$-n-Fur$ fans and my Chinchillettes worldwide…I’ll see you on American Idol!
Live @ The Liqua Sto coming soon. Get that!!!”